There’s Toilet Water In My Air Vents!

So I’m in Romance Divas’s Chat room, typing and editing my way along. I’d shoved some medicine down the kid’s throat (no easy task, I assure you!) and was waiting on him to fall asleep. He hops up to go to the bathroom. And I keep typing. Him going potty by himself isn’t exactly a new thing. We’ve been potty trained for several months. 

He comes back in the living room and is pretty interested by the air vent and he keeps hollering “Tee-tee in there! Tee-tee in there!”

Haha, mommy laughs. “No, we don’t go tee-tee in there. Did you go potty?” Points at air vent. “Me tee-tee in there.” “No, we don’t go tee-tee in there.” He’s pretty well dancing around the air vent, running down the hall and back, shouting about tee-teeing in there. On one of these trips back down the hall, there’s just this look on his face. “You need to go stinky?” I ask, cause it was kind of the stinky face look. “Stinky?” And he runs back down the hall. So I go. And I see water. EVERYWHERE. It is POURING out the bottom of the toilet. Not over the top of the bowl, not out of the tank, but streaming out the bottom that sits on the floor. But why is my toilet misbehaving so? That crazy kid of mine stuffed the toilet with nearly a whole roll of paper and then tried to flush. I shut the water off real fast and look down to see there’s so much potty water on the floor, my toes are under water.Now you can’t really see the water in this pic, but I promise you it is not the shine from my cleaning reflecting everything. And where is all this water draining? Some is soaking into my carpet and…

the rest is flowing right into the air vent. Like a waterfall. So I call The Welder and in the mean time, shout about the unbelieving sight right before my eyes to the girls in the chat room.

The Welder answers his phone. I’m expecting romance hero type actions here of, don’t worry, my love! I’ll be there shortly to take care of you and the house!My expectations were a *little* high. The Welder suggested, and we’ll use that term lightly, okay?, that I go get the shop vac from the storage shed and get to work. Louisa Edwards said it best in that I hadn’t married a romance hero, but a dude.  So here we go. For a solid three and half hours (3 1/2 folks), I’m scrunched down sucking out water. Through most of that, I’m holding the hose down in the cold as all get out air vent with the delightful distraction of Victoria Dahl’s A Rake’s Guide To Pleasure in my other hand (hey, Victoria–I bet you never thought your book would get read like this!.    But it can’t be that easy, can it? Nope. 

Hint: That’s not a piddle spot from my dog. The Vac leaks a bit. 

The Welder finally dragged home at 5:30 and I dumped it off on him. He sucked for another hour and half. After emptying that vac for a total of seven different times between the two of us, we have “enough” of the water up. I live in a single wide, I didn’t even know there was enough space in the vents to hold that much water, but apparently, there is.I guess we’ll find out when we go to turn the heater on tonight whether or not we got “enough” of the water. Hmm…I wonder if the water will steam and turn our single-wide into a sauna?